The Doc, His Cousin and Me: An Interesting Threesome

After a long somewhat stressful, definitely busy week at the office I was ready to just come home tonight and chill.  It’s a Friday, I’ve survived the post-Valentine’s Day madness, and I just want to kick back.

Earlier, I declined an invite to meet a new guy from OkCupid out for drinks (and yes, I deleted my Plenty of Fish account for certain reasons, but OkCupid has been there like a trusted standby.)

I had already re-scheduled dinner plans earlier with a girlfriend for another time.

Another text comes in.  I decline a second invitation to head out to party with a guy who I’ve known for several years, who’s interested in dating me (even though I’d rather just be friends).  He’s so much fun, but definitely not near me in Santa Monica right now, and I don’t feel like driving anywhere.

So I’m chillin’ on the couch, eating some dinner and watching American Idol on the DVR when guess who calls me out of the blue?

The Doc.

My heart skips a beat and I debate not answering.  I’m sooo tired.

But, HELLO! It’s The DOC!

So, duh, I answer.

He wants to know what I’m up to tonight.  Him and his cousin (who I’ve heard many things about) are looking for something to do, and he says it’d be nice to see me.  They’ll even come to me so I don’t have to drive.

So an hour and change later, I’m walking across the street to our local watering hole, which is ALSO the same place I had my housewarming party where The Doc and I slow danced for an hour, holding each other and catching up after not seeing each other for awhile.  Obviously special memories.

I meet his cousin.

He’s tall and built, just like The Doc, and also from Belize.

They’re both dressed nice – The Doc in a salmon-colored Nike polo shirt and jeans and his cousin in a nice collared shirt and jeans.

I’m feeling floored that I’m being introduced to family members for the first time tonight, but hey, whatever.  I can roll with it.

The Doc immediately tells his cousin that the last time we were here together he and I “slow danced to an uptempo jam while all her friends carried on around us…it was great…”

…and all of a sudden I realize that The Doc has DEFINITELY told his cuzzo about who I am and what I mean to The Doc, on more than one occasion and knows things like I’ve stayed at his house before, and how we both love when he makes coffee in the mornings with his new French press contraption.  And, he’s not shy or embarrassed or squeamish about these details.

Refreshing.

It’s almost like we’re dating.

We all laugh, we joke, we have a GREAT time.

His cousin, more than once, laughs at my jokes or high fives me for giving The Doc some crap about something or other (I like to give him a hard time…he loves our sharp, witty banter).

On several occasions, his cousin looks at The Doc after something I said and goes, “I approve” as he points at me and smiles.  “Yeah, man…”

At one point, his cousin says, “I’ve never seen him smile so much.  He wasn’t even smiling til you walked in, and now he can’t stop!”

It’s cute.

We banter, we flirt, we order fancy drinks (of which they are both connoisseurs of good drinks) and talk about several things, including love and relationships.

Yes, we went there.  In a light-hearted kinda way.

I have no problem telling The Doc that he’s more of a “Tinder than eHarmony kinda guy,” mostly to test him and his lack of commitment conversations we’ve had so many times in the past.

But tonight he actually defends himself!

Which is weird cuz that’s not like him.

Plus, we’re talking about all of this with his cousin, too, who’s very much a part of this conversation.

I’m finding it very interesting how open and vulnerable The Doc is being.  Not only with me, but in front of his cousin, too! We’ve had many a deep conversation by ourselves, but this is unique.  I know they’re super close and it’s obvious he’s comfortable in this space.

The Doc tells me maybe he IS more of an eHarmony target customer but that most people just don’t know his heart is actually on the other side, so they can’t find it.

I joke that he just shared with me where his heart is, and whether or not he realized that, and he says, “That’s ok that you know.  I know you won’t break it.”

Breakthrough.

I tell him “that’s true” and deep down I know that if this man truly gave me his heart, it’d be the world’s best love story, and that I’d love him more than anyone I’ve ever loved in my life.  There are SO many things I love and respect about who this man is as a person.

His cousin goes to the bathroom at one point and The Doc pulls me close and tells me how good it is to see me.

I’m in familiar territory but I refuse to get all goo-goo-gaa-gaa over this moment, because I never know really where he’s at.  My heart is protected now, too.

Eventually the bar is closing down so he takes care of the check.

We walk out and he wants to walk me home (across the street) like a gentleman.

I hug his cousin goodbye as he waits for valet to get their car.  He says he definitely wants to see me again, and that we’ll make plans.  I like him – he’s cool people!

The Doc walks me to my door.  We stand reallllly close to each other, we hug, he tells me I smell good.

We banter, I give him crap about the whole “Tinder vs eHarmony” thing again, he tells me to quit, smiles, he thanks me (again) for coming out to meet them, and I thank him for meeting me here so close to my place.

We kiss, and I wipe some of my very red lipstick off of his lips after.

“Oops, sorry,” I say.

He shrugs and says, “I like it.”

We then hug and say good night and he watches me walk away, with this big cheesy, adorable grin on his face.

And there ya have it.

A random night with The Doc, where he wanted me to meet his cousin.  So I did.

It means everything, nothing or something in the middle.

Too late and too much to figure out with this guy, so instead, I’m heading to bed.

The story of The Doc & I continues…

Shenanigans, indeed.

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Frustration, an Ex and the Deleting of my Plenty of Fish Account

Valentine’s Day is this Friday.

As of today (Monday morning), I have no plans with anyone special and I’m doing my best to not flip my lid.

Not that I think the world will end if no one asks me on a date for Valentine’s Day, but with all of the recent shenanigans activity you would think SOMEONE would make a move. But, no.  Nothing yet.

Let me update you.

Since my last blog, there’s been MUCH going on.  With several people.

I’ve spent a tremendous amount of time with Mr. Architect lately, and also saw The Doc.

Both are special men who I have a unique connection with, especially The Doc, for those of you who’ve been reading our 8-month-long journey.

Also, last night a guy I used to date briefly a few years back got together with me and told me that his world stops and time stands still whenever he sees me, and that he’s never wanted to be with anyone other than me and how special and connected he feels with me. “If you’re ready for a relationship, I’m sure you’ll pick me.”

Ummm, no.

You’re not the one, buddy.  We had our moments, but that window has closed.  Thanks for pouring your heart out to me, but I can’t help if I know in my heart you’re not the one, and now I’m even MORE frustrated because you’re a nice guy offering me what I want, but I have no feelings for you.

So, hence my frustration because no one seems to be willing to make any REAL moves here.  Well, correction – the guys I WANT to make moves, aren’t.

Or my Prince Charming just hasn’t arrived yet and I’m still being taught how to be patient.

Patience, my ass.  Ain’t nobody got time for that!

(Ok, that was probably the most ironic statement of all time.  So, just kidding.)

So, on Saturday morning, I had logged on to my Plenty Of Fish account.

POF shows you who’s “online” of the guys you’ve been talking to, messaging, or in some cases people you’ve met in real life from POF who still have an active account.

I log in to check my messages and see what’s going on.  It’s kinda become as routine as checking emails.

Who do I see “online?”

Mr. Architect.

Again.

I’ve now seen him “online” every day for the past two weeks or so and it’s obvious he’s still using the site.  In fact, there have been a few times where we’ve both just seen each other, and 20 minutes later are both logged into “Plenty of Fish.” That can’t be good, right?

So I see him logged in on Saturday.

That’s fine.  We’re not married, but for some reason this really starts to bother me.

His communication with me lately is still pretty good, we’ve seen each other a lot, we text and email all the time and he’s “serious about this” with me, so it’s always weird to see someone say and do these things yet continue to log back into the dating site that brought you two together in the first place.

I can’t stand it any longer.  I actually thought Mr. Architect and I were heading down the path of only being interested in each other (he even has told me that his intuition told him I was “the one” when he first saw my profile online, among other serious conversations we’ve had about what we’re both looking for, etc).

Yeah, so why be online so much?

So I delete my Plenty Of Fish account.

I need a break.

Too much to figure out, lately, and I need answers.

Ok, I don’t need answers, I’d just really like to know what’s going on inside the heads of a few people.

I feel more comfortable with stability here, and guessing what’s going to happen, or waiting to see what’ll develop gets old real fast.

Deleting my POF account helped relieve some of that stress.  I’ll no longer have to know if this dude is online talking to plenty of other fish in the sea everytime I log in!

(Side note: I DELETED MY POF ACCOUNT! Did you read that part?! Not sure if you realize, but for me, that’s like the equivalent of a smoker giving up cigarettes.  Oh wait.  I just made the analogy of dating to quitting an addicting, disgusting disease that makes you smell nasty and could eventually kill you at some point.  Hmmm….gulp.)

So there ya have it.

A brief update on the love life.

(Second side note: I did talk to my sister who lives in Nebraska for quite awhile this weekend, too.  She’s married and has been off the market for awhile now.  She asked why it was so tough to date in LA, and I’ve broken it down to two reasons, but that’s best left for another blog.)

Thanks for reading, my friends.

Love and hearts and roses and stuff…to you all.  If I don’t have a Valentine by Friday, I’ll be sure to choose you guys instead, deal? 🙂

#DatingDilemma: The Doc is BACK!

I got a text today from The Doc.

I DIED.

(If you don’t know about my history with Dr. Slow Dance, you should check out the numerous blog posts. Basically, we both think each other is amazing yet he’s not been interested in anything that looks, sounds, tastes or acts like a relationship, even though I think he may potentially be my soulmate.  BOO.)

We chat briefly and then he asks what I’m doing later tonight.

Well, damn.  I’m taking Mr. Architect out for his birthday.  We’ve been seeing a lot of each other.  Like, a LOT.

He tells me he misses seeing me, and adds a winky face.

I’m still dying…

He feels like seeing something with comedy or improv.

So I tell him I’m not available tonight, but tomorrow looks good.

We make plans.

And there ya have it.

Let my freaking out commence.

AAAHH!!!

SO…..

EDIT: Ok, some of you are choosing “Other.” What the heck does that mean?! You gotta let me know! Comment or ping me if we’re friends on FB. 🙂